Thank you for the days

Click Me

"Thank you for the days" – so sang The Kinks in their 1968 classic hit 'Days', capturing an important truth: be thankful (grateful) for every day.

You see, being thankful and practising gratitude can have a tremendously positive impact on our wellbeing, mood and inner contentment. As long as you can get your head around the concept, that is.

Gratitude at a Glance

I, for one, was really grabbling with the definition. I had difficulty distinguishing between being thankful and being grateful. While I understood being thankful, I thought being grateful was, somehow, about lowering your standards and accepting the breadcrumbs.

When people said ‘you should be grateful for what you’ve got’ - I heard ‘I’m giving you the very minimum and you should be happy about that – so don’t ask or expect any more’. But that was while I was in a 26 year toxic relationship, so no wonder I misunderstood.

Now I’m out of that environment – where I really did have to express an exaggerated amount of appreciation for an insubstantial amount of anything – I can understand that being grateful is both an emotion as well as a state.

The emotion part certainly seems to run deeper than being thankful. You could describe gratitude as a stronger longer-lasting feeling – one that remains well-after the something or someone that caused it has gone. Whether that's a disaster you've avoided, a favourable situation or fortitude you've experienced, or a kind gesture, opportunity, piece of advice or gift. Gratitude, over being thankful, has more of a permanence about it.

And it's when gratitude syncs with your being and infiltrates your habits and general outlook on life that it goes beyond being an emotion and becomes a state; a character trait, if you like. It’s important to note though, this state doesn’t come automatically – it takes work.

Self-awareness is the precursor to gratitude

The first step towards being able to include gratitude in your approach to life involves growing your self-awareness.

Self-awareness is the ability to recognise your own thoughts and feelings. It's having the internal means to understand your emotions and behaviour. It's being able to identify what makes you tick and having the strength of mind to consciously alter your thoughts and actions.

We all need self-awareness to know when to press pause on what we are thinking or doing and take stock of what we have over what we don't. For example, when our thoughts spiral out of control with the ‘should haves’, ‘what ifs’, and all the ‘worst case scenarios’, it’s self-awareness that allows us to bring ourselves back to the moment and choose the positive over the negative.

And being grateful sits firmly with the positive.

Why do gratitude?

Research shows that gratitude is a powerful tool which can unlock greater contentment, build resilience and improve health and wellbeing.

The science says:

• People who keep gratitude journals report fewer physical symptoms, feel better about their lives as a whole, and are more optimistic about the future.

• Expressing gratitude strengthens relationships and increases social bonds.

• Gratitude reduces toxic emotions like envy, resentment, frustration, and regret.

• Grateful people sleep better and experience less depression.

  
  

The more we practice gratitude, the more our minds are drawn more towards the positive. The knock-on effect is that we develop a brighter outlook on life, become more present and engaged in what we do, see and experience, and feel more joyous and content.

The wise ones say:

The science has been endorsed for hundreds of years by the teachings of Buddha and Ghandi and is finding it's way firmly into modern day teachings - centred around health and wellbeing.

One of my favourite podcasters – The Mindset Mentor with Rob Dial – says gratitude is not just about saying 'thank you' but about truly feeling appreciation in your heart and body. It's an embodied experience that goes beyond mere words.

In his book, Think Like a Monk, Jay Shetty (another favourite of mine), says we need to amplify our gratitude as the world is full of things to be grateful for and starting the day with gratitude opens us up to greater opportunities and fewer obstacles.

The message from Diary of a CEO's Steven Bartlett is loud and clear in his book Happy Sexy Millionnaire. He says: “Be grateful, for gratitude can bring life to life, it can turn a meal to a feast, resentment to love, a grudge to forgiveness, an enemy to a friend, a disease to hope and you to enough.”

And one of the most truthful modern-day philosophers - David Goggins - says be grateful for what you've got and all your other problems will melt away.

And something I’ve found is that gratitude is contagious. When I say what I’m grateful for amongst friends, family and work colleagues, it seems to make them stop and think for a minute – particularly if they’ve just been complaining. In my experience, my expressing gratitude jolts whoever I’m with into suddenly switching their own thoughts onto what they are grateful for.

How to do gratitude

So how do we tap into gratitude so it becomes part of us? Well, we have to use our self-awareness to deliberately cultivate it and make it part of your daily habits. We have to consciously practice it – schedule it in so it becomes a habit and starts to really alter how our brains construe our thoughts.

There are many ways to do gratitude – here are 10 suggestions you can use to hit the ground running:

1. Journal: Take a few minutes each day to write down 3-5 things you're grateful for. These can range from significant life events to simple pleasures. The key, though, is to be specific and get down to the detail.

2. Meditate: Set aside time to focus your mind on the things you are grateful for. Begin with deep breathing, then bring to mind people, experiences, or things that enrich your life. Feel the gratitude in your body and heart.

3. Remember the small things: Start by being grateful for the small things in the life - the basics - like waking up in the morning, having air to breathe and the ground to walk on.

4. Write gratitude letters: Write a letter expressing your appreciation to friends, family and colleagues who have positively impacted your life. You can send these letters – or keep them for yourself.

5. Write reminders: Make gratitude notes and placing them around your home or work environment to remind you of the positives in life - of what you have.

6. Set reminders: Scheduling reminders into your phone throughout the day will help you build gratitude into your daily practices and make it a habit.

7. Share your gratitude: Find a friend or family member with who you can share gratitude lists regularly. This accountability helps maintain the practice and strengthens your relationship simultaneously.

8. Visualise gratitude: Make a mental picture of what gratitude looks like. Take yourself to where you find gratitude - be that a situation, a place or a person.

9. Reframe difficult situations: When facing difficulties, ask yourself: 'What might this situation be teaching me?' or 'What strength am I developing through this challenge?' This doesn't minimise problems but helps extract value - and gratitude - from them.

10. Be mindful: Take a walk with the sole intention of noticing things to appreciate. This combines the benefits of gratitude with those of physical exercise and connection with nature.

    
    

    Carla Eschenbeck is a freelance writer and author of Run for Your Life - published by 10 Reasons.

    
    

    Run for Your Life explores '10 reasons' why running will help improve your life. It is available for purchase (kindle and paperback) via Amazon.

BUY IT NOW on Amazon